Tuesday, June 19, 2007

seven (again...so more like fourteen)

Wow! When I made my William Shakespeare blog as an assignment for English (some of you possibly stumbled across that and were confused), my teacher actually ended up finding this blog and was impressed with it. So thanks to this little blogging addiction, which has admittedly been eating up some time that should be spent English-ing, I have one less essay to write! That was quite kind of my teacher, seeing as how I have not found my recent entries to up be up to par with my older "works".

I did this back in January, but there are zillions of surprising and fascinating things about me, so it shouldn't be too difficult thinking of seven more. Thanks to those who tagged me!

1. I am trying to talk more like a pirate

How does one go about this? (Well, for one thing, they don't saying things like "how does one...") Well, it's crucial to be replacing "my" with "me", as in "Mick Jagger is me future boyfriend." You also tell obvious lies, as in "Mick Jagger is me future boyfriend." 'Scurvy' is a great adjective, as in "You scurvy wino, Mick Jagger is me future boyfriend."
Oh, and mention rum a lot.

2. Sigh
Number two was going to be "I plan on seducing Roman Polanski this summer" because I'm reading his autobiography and I think he's so great. He also had a little incident with a 13-year-old year girl so he clearly has no qualms about having sex with teenagers, and he lives in Paris, where I'm going to be this summer. But then researching him for a picture, I find out he's been
married for 18 years! This is a good oppourtunity to quote Dorothy Parker (though, really, when isn't?):
Thanks, Roman, for ruining my summer plans by being MARRIED and all. Obviously you don't care about young teenaged girls anymore, especially ones that want to fuck you!

3. I'm going to see Prince this summer.

Just in case you forgot.

4. I love Sherlock Holmes

The books, the movies, the TV show. Did you know he was a cocaine addict? It was much more common back then, though. My favorite thing is when Watson says something really obvious and Holmes roars "I'M WELL AWARE!"
Call me boy-crazy (or, I guess, old man crazy) but he's pretty sexy is his own snooty way.

5. It's my birthday on Monday!

I shall be sixteen, and definitely planning a Super Sweet Sixteen party. It will have juggling dwarfs, and emus with their fur dyed purple, and free naked pix of everyone, and I will be hiring Mick Jagger to be my boyfriend for the night.
The whole night.

6. I'm getting bangs on Friday...
and I'm scared to death. If it gets messed up my life is ruined.
I need to have great hair.

7. If I could pick my date of birth it would be June 25th, 1947
That would be perfect. My birthday's already June 25th and it's great because I'm always within 6 months of my birthday or Christmas. 1947..so I can experience the sixties proper!


Emma said...

You are so right, there is never a bad time to quote Dorothy Parker. You know how you always wanted to go back to the sixties? I want to go back to the times of the Algonquin Round Table.
"You scurvy wino, Mick Jagger is me future boyfriend'. Oh, you are TOO GENIUS.
And as for forgetting the "little people"...child, please. You are so the opposite of a little person (not that I'm saying you're large, or that dwarves are bad. But you see what I mean, yes?)

Anonymous said...

haha, let me know how the whole talking-like-a-pirate things goes, sounds hilarious! also, make sure to start calling women, wenches...just a tip ;)

i know what you mean about roman, it's kinda like, "damn you, clive owen, for being married"
"damn you marlon brando, for being dead, and getting old AND fat before you died!"

but then again, i have much to be thankful for, thank you reese witherspoon for being a biatch and dumping jake gyllehaal, i shall come to heartbroken side ASAP

i've always been more of an agatha christy fan myself, but then again i was known to dabble in some sherlock holmes myself, plus "no shit, sherlock" is such a great expression & without him it wouldn't have existed! oh and how can he be a coke addict, if um, he's fictional?


i used to have bangs until age 15, they were awful on me, but they can be super cute or edgy on others, currently i'm rocking the sideswept bangs though

Pretty In Black said...

Happy Birthday! I want to see Prince! I want to go to France! Roman Polanski looks hot! Please write about all of this and make me feel like I was there....(dreamy sigh)

Pretty In Black said...

Yeah thats the book! When I saw it it was face down. As you know, the back says "Let your freak flag fly!" and I was like "Right On!"

Jennifer said...

omigod the cherry blossom hat hahah reminds me of the early 90s your so lucky your going to see prince, I love that picture of him with the jerry curl!
happy birthday!

yeah that was hilary duff in the pic;)

the lipstick lady said...

16!!! woohooo that's so exciting. you should go on my super sweet sixteen and demand mick jagger and prince to be VIP guests at your party and then abduct them and take them to a secret layer where you can make billions of their miniatures, and then create a big army. or just have a huge orgy. Well... it's my super sweet sixteen! people get 2 cars! why not 2 rock gods??

and oh yes, I'm all ready to whore myself out. I could have some kind of trademark like nigella who always uses the words 'voluptuous' and... something else, but I could say 'sexypants' instead, because I've taken to using that word a lot lately. I could say it like 'and you'll create a smooth, rich chocolatey desert that has cinnamon aromas and is altogether one big sexypants'. Like you and your piracy. I mean, pirate words. I'm not accusing you of piracy in any way.

Joyce said...

A super sweet sixteen party i hope not similar to the ones you see at mtv?:p


Brian Mandabach said...

But are these new? What I mean is, are you about to have a b-day now, or did you have it back in january? Becuase I want to hear how it went, as well as see how the bangs worked. I love bangs on my wife, who gets bored and tortures herself with growing them out. See my response to your comment on my blog, and I still have to tell you about Ginsberg, don't I?

alexgirl said...

can't believe you're going to see Prince this summer! i'm so jealous.
please take a million pictures and describe it in complete detail. (i think you already mentioned you were going, but it is still very exciting.)

WAT said...

You know what? I too wish I could've experienced the sixties. I often fel I must've had a past life during that decade, because I love the music and rebellion that happened back then. This is why I loved "The Wonder Years." It spoke to me damnit!