Wednesday, December 19, 2007

SPEARS FAMILY BABY SHOCK!


I tried hard to avoid blogging about this, but I can't hold back any longer. I'm giving in and blogging about Jamie Lynn Spears. Because really, I was shocked when she announced her pregnancy. I really thought it was a joke. I'm not going to go the usual "Oh, she's just like her sister" route. This one's about me, bitch.
I'll take you through my range of emotions, because I know you're dying of curiousity.
First, disbelief. Then shock. Followed by denial, joy, nausea, hunger, pity and finally longing.
No, I'm not longing for a baby of my own, even though Jamie Lynn and I are both at the tender (cough, cough) age of 16. As soon as I heard the news (and experienced nine other emotions), I felt the calling. Gentle and lilting at first, but then stronger and insistent. I knew who was calling. Yes, my friends, it was Destiny. I'm going to be a nanny for Jamie Lynn's baby. I feel it is my objective in life, to mold that baby's soul and spirit, change its diapers while its mother frolicks with other older men (super-illegally, I might add - I could never get away with something like this). Of course there are a few issues to be sorted out. I don't want to live in LA or Louisianna, thanks. I've made the conscientious decision: the Spears Family and I are up and moving to London. On their paycheck of course. But, hey, don't scoff - I'd be a fantastic nanny. I wouldn't sell their story to the newspapers....and really, that's all the Spears look for in an employee. And thus far, they've been failing.
So I hereby nominate myself.
Molly for Spears Baby #3 Nanny in '08!

16 comments:

Katelin said...

Haha, please be their nanny. That poor family needs so much help it's kind of ridiculous.

Belle said...

lol. you read my mind, working on a post about that now.

Heather said...

Definitely! Please bring them some sanity and fashion sense.

My friend put it really well when she referred to Little Spears as the "last hope."

Oh, and you're the first person I've seen to blog about this and I'm glad you did!

Sister Libby said...

Ohhh. Jamie! Scandal!
My theroy was that she will have a "miscarrage". I feel bad for the girl...really, something like this could happen to anyone.

gill said...

you have my vote. I think its hilarious that she thinks she is going to keep her tv show. they are going to give it a few days and then drop her like a hot potato. not to mention A) the fact the she is PREGNANT. does she think they are just going to make her get fat in the show? B) she says she wants to raise the baby in Louisiana. I'm pretty sure thats not where her show films.

WAT said...

The swamps in that state must've tainted the Spears family and their sense of reasoning.

I'm amazed at how much Jamie loox like her older sis. I guess it makes sense, but STILL! So who impregnated her? Another loser like K-FED? GOD I SURE HOPE NOT!

You'd make a terrific nanny by the way, and you'd expose the child to great musical taste!

The Clothes Horse said...

You would be a fantastic nanny for that poor unfortunate child. I was really, really shocked as well and just so sad. Their lives seem very sad.

WendyB said...

When Destiny calls, you must answer!!!

Carolina Lange said...

That is unbelievable!

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Emma said...

MOLLY. quite literally, my friend and i were discussing becoming au pairs for the spears estate. we said we didn't mind louisiana as long as we're provided with individual limos.
WAY TO SHARE A BRAIN WITH ME.

Emma said...

god my dad found out the first thing he said was trailer trash family!

Francisca said...

I think you would be the best thing in that family. It's so sad. I feel sorry for those sisters..somehow I just want brit to comeback. Jeez...well, I guess you should stay away from that Bazaar story and......go to London any way...find an gorgeous British guy and live happy ever until you find that USA guys can be so much better..it depends. LOL you are Hilarius..your posts are my addiction, next to mine :P

Blaze said...

Are you really?!?!

Bojana said...

What a ridiculous family, seriously. Ain't it sad?? You need to be that babie's nanny and teach it something good.

baby1042 said...

I think Jamie having a baby is cute. i mean. its not like shes sleeping with every guy. i don't think she's a slut. i mean all teenagers are having sex now days. its not weird that she has sex or anything. But. she should have waited on the baby. she should have been taking birth control.