Tuesday, February 17, 2009

throw your hands up now, let the music take control, this is how we roll

If you were born around the same time I was (late 80's, early 90's), you'll probably remember that glorious period of such musical richness known as the turn of the millenium.
Just to hit you in your nostalgia bone, here's some of the classics that exemplified the greatness of the times. We were truly blessed to be able to experience such classics in their prime.




Aaron Carter - "Not Too Young, Not Too Old" (2001)
You'd totally forgotten that at one point Aaron Carter was actually a pop star, didn't you? (Actually, more like you'd probably forgotten that at one point, people knew who Aaron Carter was) With his "fresh" beats and "def" rhymes, the original Mr. Carter was a rare musical progeny. Not afraid to get sassy ("Don't even playa-hate and try'n'say I look ten" - I wouldn't dream of playa-hatin' on you like that, Aaron - you look at least twelve) and not too proud to take advantage of his BSB connection by getting his older brother to sing the hook, Aaron was a brilliant meteor of star power and excellent rhymes - he could even awkwardly bust of some extremely white-boy breakdance moves. T-Pain, take note: Aaron busts out the AutoTune, robo-hook at 1:45 a good five years before you make your bread and butter on it. Aaron Carter: 2 - rap community at large: 0.
And the video ho's? You know the ones he's thrown his arms around and are rocking back and forth with him in a manner that looks extremely uncomfortable. They're definitely setting the standard for today's women of musical film. The way they lean out through giant R's and wave excitedly at Aaron? It oozes the sort of innocent sexuality that ends up with Aaron getting lipstick kiss marks everywhere on his face but the lips. Ouch.




Dream - "He Loves U Not" (2000)
You know these chicks mean business from the beginning: a little bit of piano paired with the girls posing in front of a neon sign of the band's name. And then...what's this? AutoTune again?? And to think all this time, I've been hailing T-Pain as a creative genius, and it's been the pop artists of the early oo's who innovated this trend. They just never stop influencin', do they?
Let's take a moment to appreciate their all-pink...what is that, suede? little dance suits. To anyone who thinks life has gotten continually worse since that 60's, look at how far we've come in the last decade, thank you. Also don't forget to appreciate the special effects at 2:49; I know my mind was blown.
It's nice that they add "And that's me" to the end of "He's into what he's got"...just in case we hadn't figured it out. Really, what this song makes me think is "They're going to be incredibly humiliated when their guy leaves them for this girl." Cuz it's inevitable! To paraphrase the Bard, "Methinks the lady doth protest too much" - if you're going to go on and on and on about how some common girl has no chance with your man, I think you're running scared a bit, dontcha think? However, the girl with the short blond hair just doesn't give a fuck. Look into her eyes - she's fantasizing about riding tractors with her girlfriend.
Still, pop genius courtesy of...Diddy? Mmkay, then.



O-Town - "Liquid Dreams" (2001)
You can't let the boy bands get off scot-free because, if anything, they were much worse. I mean, really, can you even believe now that millions of girls (and probably you - yes, you....J'accuse) wanted a man with frosted tips, sleeveless muscle shirts, suspicious facial hair, vinyl pants and an earring?
Even if you're too embarassed to watch the whole video, please, for your own sake, check out the overly enthusiastic "Damn!" at 0:37. It's also a little disconcerting that a thinly veiled ode to nocturnal emissions was such a splash (no pun intended...okay, intended a little bit now that I notice) among preteens. This thing really shows its age when you hear who exactly they combine to make their perfect girl.


Truly a flawless woman.


Crazytown - "Butterfly" (2001)
It's hard to sort this one into a genre...my instincts would call it shit-pop, but the band has lots of tattoos so it must be punk. It's sad but I've always found it amusing (on a most pedestrian level) when guys who obviously do lots of drugs wear the anti-drug D.A.R.E. shirts. But anyway, the dope rhymes keep this songs real - for example, "My lifestyle wild/I was livin' like a wild child". That one almost tricks you into thinking it's clever: "Whoa...quadruple rhyme." Don't be fooled.
Another fun, uh, feature is how they go from claiming that they don't deserve a woman to telling her that the smartest thing she ever did was take a chance with him. Textbook playa material - run, lady!
Anybody else get hardcore Zoolander flashbacks at 2:25?
The most notable thing about this song, for me, is that it contains one of my (many) pet peeves: when guys (usually in songs) think it's romantic to compare their own relationship to Sid and Nancy. That's almost...a murder threat. Yikes. Keep him away from hunting knives.

26 comments:

Guy Faux said...

LOVES IT.

I was completely clueless at the age of ten in the year 2000, so I don't remember these, but ohhh man. What a time.

w. said...

no problem miss molly!
& i used to love that dream & o-town song, haha, i still have that o-town cd, & i used to have this silly fanbook of them.

Allison said...

Molly, you seriously never cease to make my day!
It's so funny because two nights ago, my roommate and I were talking about all the songs from the 90's, 2000's, and we COMPLETELY forgot about the darling Aaron Carter (though I was definitely partial to Aaron's Party [Come Get It]).
This was a total blast from the past - so fun!

Rebecca, A Clothes Horse said...

Oh man, you are taking me back. I still have a soft spot for "Butterfly." :)
P.S. I take my own pictures using a self-timer.

Emz said...

haha oh yea I had all of these songs on my itunes. come to think of it.. i wonder if i ever deleted them!

this wheel's on fire said...

oh. my. god. terrible flashbacks! we just need a little sclub 7 (that was their name, right?). too good in the worst way possible. thank god we discovered the 60's or else we'd still be hooked on the spice girls (who i still occasionally listen to shamelessly...) not that i still blast them when i'm driving alone....why? ;)

Lexie said...

I LOVED that Dream song. You hush.

Guy Faux said...

also, speaking of music that is actually good and funk - New Groove Orchestra. Best Montreal funk band ever. Started in the basement of my dorm. They have a 5-piece horn section and an electric frontwoman who wears shiny leaotards and afros and makes you fall in love. Way better than Oasis!

LYNN and HORST said...

perfect selection

Ania said...

Born in 1989, now I feel old.
Still, Spice Girls were the shit these days. Me and my friends used to perform as Spice Girls at some school parties (we were 10).
We've had rehearsals after classes, practised our moves and all, good times ;D

Jill said...

Ugh! I'm glad I was too old for these.

Keith said...

LOL I turned 30 in the year 2000 so I wasn't really into any of these songs. I do remember some of them though.

Baybay Mama said...

I was born in '81 and I must have turned a blind eye to all this but I do watch a show sometimes (its terrible) called Sober House and the dude from Crazy Town is on there for being an addict, it's super sad....but when all these videos came out I was in high school and following Phish around so I guess its understandable why I wasn't into it.

I am so glad you love De Ja Vu...you have excellent taste in music my dear!

Sister Libby said...

I was a bigger fan of Aaron Carters "that's how i beat shaq" and that one song about the house party, but I think that was a little earlier. And I got Zoolander flashbacks too. I love nostalgia, and could honestly listen to that shiz on a regular basis, just for the "ah, I remember when we saw the 7th year couple exchanging gum through kissing on the bus, and all screamed and ran away" moments.

Mimi said...

Love love love this post.. It brought back some memories! I was never into O-town they had one song that I liked. But just yesterday I was on AOL listening to XM 90s pop and Dream came on... I forgot how much I liked them!

Great post

xo

Daughters of Dawn said...

Another tag! I think you'll like this one
xo

Katelin said...

ohmygosh i loved all of these songs, haha. wow.

jess said...

I was like 8 when these were out. I still remeber the words to the dream songs.Aaron Carter was my first celbrity crush I had his poster from Aarons party come and get it on wall wall.

Eyeliah said...

Molly! You make me feel old, I was too old for these even when they came out!! lol, I remember that girl group, I think they won a competition. And did you know that Crazy Town song takes it's hook from the Red Hot Chili Peppers Pretty Little Ditty, so they would have made no money off their only hit - brutal.

Anonymous said...

awww...thanks for the comment. you are too sweet :)
xoxo,
Micaela

twenty.seven.cents said...

lol. I used to be quite the Aaron Carter fan.. thank god that that is only my 12 year old self, not my 20 year old self.. how sad. :/

I was thinking about Butterfly the other day and thinking that I liked it. Now I've just listened to it again, and no, it is not a good song. not. at. all. lol

WAT said...

That O-TOWN video/song is truly horrific! WOW! I am stunned! Nice-looking boys I suppose, but MY GAWD!

Eddie said...

Nice to see your nostalgic list Molly love. I particularly remember O-Town because I actually watched the reality show they did when the group was coming together.

I also remember their pervert, child-molesting, swindling manager Lou Pearlman.

Besos para siempre.

kristine said...

I am laughing my head off--I got linked here from yesandyes, and I can't believe I missed this post because these songs were AMAZING! I totally forgot about "He Loves You Not"--with their corny logo stolen straight from the decor section of Hobby Lobby.

Covet Deschanel said...

hahahaha

Swear, that O Town was my favorite group ever. I loveddd Liquid Dreams.

Excellent post.
:)

spamantha said...

oh wow, memory laaaaaaane.
butterfly was probably my favorite song EVER.