Monday, March 09, 2009

its the way you flip your hair and the stylish clothes you wear, when you walk into the room all my partners stop and stare

It's time for another exciting round of plugging vintage by answering fake letters demanding help choosing clothing for obscure (also fake events). The clothes, however, are real, and being sold by myself on my online vintage store Safe as Milk Vintage or my friend Nicola on her online vintage store Nicola's Vintage Boutique.

The fast track to being cool and stylish, as everyone knows, is to let a stranger tell you how to dress. So sit back, relax and dig.

Situation:
"I enjoy taking to my boat to cruise the peninsula, but my fashion-obsessed preteen daughter is not the nautical type. She'd much rather be shopping for tank tops to show off her toned arms (she's quite the softball player, you know). Anyway, her birthday is coming up and I'd like to buy her something to encourage her to sailboat more often with us, as she is a slave to her own clothing and will do whatever it hints that she should (for this very reason, she no longer shops at Hot Topic). What do you suggest I do?"
Solution:
Your entire family seems to have issues far beyond my abilities but I can hook you and your daughter up with a very charming sailboat tank top.
This top is perfect for a smaller girl, either someone young or someone quite petite. I just love the sailboat design, and the overall 70's vibe. Find it here.

Situation:
"I am obsessed with London fashion. Specifically, the 60's mod scene and the 90's rave scene. I often dream of ways these two worlds could collide but it seems, sadly, that this could probably never be. Anyway, now that I've rambled to you for a bit about a fully unrelated topic that is definitely not foreshadowing of any sort, I will get down to my query and it is this: I am a contestant in the Banana Sunrise Leg O' The Morning To Ya beauty pagaents (it's a bit obscure). It involves dressing up in yellow and showing off one's legs (plus we get bonus points for a little cleavage). As I am known for my vintage flair, I need to take something old and make it look new and exciting (and flaunt my legs - and cleavage!)"
Solution:
How funnily coincidental that you should mention a desire for a mod/rave yellow minidress with cleavage. For Nicola happens to be a selling an extremely fetching little number of the very sort!Legs? Check. Cleavage? Check. Yellow? Check. Plus it's super mod, with a neon raver flair (you can't tell it very well in the picture, but it is, in fact, quite neon). And the cut-outs add a whole new element of excitement sure to impress the judges. Miss Banana Sunrise 2009, no need for thanks, just click here.

Situation:
"I consider myself to be something of a quirky soul. I enjoy eccentric dress and fun accessories. Recently I chopped my formerly-long-and-luxuious hair off and, though I love my new style, I have noticed a gaping space between my earlobes and my shoulders. For some reason, I find this unsettling. I need some large earrings to fill the literal void above my shoulders and the figurative void of not wearing enough cool accessories.
I also have a deep affinity for nocturnal creatures. There's just something about preying at night I find thoroughly exciting."
Solution:
If by "preying at night" you mean "wearing owl earrings", well, I can help your life get a whole lot more exciting.
Boom. Now, do you love it or do you want to sacrifice a litter of kittens to wear it on your ears? Okay, just loving it is enough for me. Give in to your own desires here.

Situation:
"I looooooooove The Who. Like, looooooooooooooove. Soo badass, with the blind pinballing and the bleeding hands and the "YOU CAN'T HAVE IT" and the mod beginnings and whatnot. ANYWHO, strangely enough, what I love most about The Who is their early 80's period. When I saw them on their '82 American tour, my brain was blown so wide open I'm still missing a small chunk of my frontal lobe. Is there anything vintage I could wear to flaunt my highly specified feelings about The Who?"
Solution:
Strangely, yes. Would an original '82 Who concert t-shirt do it for ya?
Faded to rock-star goodness, this rock tee will bring the badass to every occasion. You don't even need your frontal lobe to enjoy it - just a click here.

Situation:
"I love the 1960's and most particularly the London mod scene of the times. I work in an office and need a mod-like outfit that would be appropriate to wear to work. I also fancy one of my co-workers and would like to emphasize my blue eyes, as I saw on a Facebook survey he posted that eyes are his "favourite part of the opposite sex". I also love the look of buttons but lack the full dexterity to maneuver them. Please help."
Solution:
It's like shooting rubber duckies in a barrel. Would this mod minidress suit your needs?
Yes, yes, it would. The style = mod and appropriate for the office, the pattern = fun and original, the buttons = ornamental, the colour = very complimentary for blue eyes. You're good to go! Just click here.

16 comments:

The Clothes Horse said...

Situation: Just read an awesome post and need to find an adequate response to show my appreciation.
Solution: Mimic style since imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Sister Libby said...

Oh, I DO have that extra space between my shoulders and earlobes that I never really thought about! You know my feelings on the owls...

And that's funny that you mentioned twink, because to me a twink is like, a small gay man (Zac Efron is my go-to example). I think I type quite similar to how I actally talk, too. Which, after I read it, is really humiliating. My Swedish companions say that it's a typical English speaking thing to say "uhhh" and "yeahh" and stuff between all of my words.

And I am linking your Safe As Milk shop. I don't know why I neglected to before...

FRINGE INDIE MAGAZINE said...

I'm obsessed with London Fashion too.. i love the punk wear...

Eyeliah @ stylesymmetry.com said...

hehe, I like it! Like the who tee a bunch too, off to your shop! :-)

Katelin said...

i'm more in london music than london fashion, but hey whatever works right? :)

Aretha said...

The last dress, ohhh my :)

Allison said...

Seriously, why are you so brilliant and fantastic? You're unbelievably witty and never cease to make me laugh.
I adore London fashion...I wish I lived there so I could be more on top of trends!

copperoranges said...

that sailboat top is adorable!

thedrifterandthegypsy said...

lovely post! nice solutions. i love everyone of these pieces, they are unique in their own different way. i think i like the last one the best, though.
xoxo,
Micaela

P.S. and about the lady hawk shoot thing, i've seen bits and pieces around the internet and never knew it was her that shot that photoshoot, so i was very excited to learn that that was her work.

jayne said...

that final mod dress is fantastic and these posts always make me laugh

Diana said...

How in the forth do you come up with such wit and humor?

Sunniva said...

60s + 90s: yes please, thank you very much!
Legs and cleavage: The more, the merrier, I say. I believe in "show it off while you're young and while your bits are in all the right places".
Miss Banana Sunrise 2009: Just the name makes me wish there was such a pageant.
60s vintage mod neon cut-out mini dress: I wish you were mine!

Have a lovely Tuesday, dear Molly xxx

Keith said...

Hey Molly. This was really cool. I love how you could up with an outfit to wear in pretty much any situation. Great job. These are all very awesome. I really liked that yellow number. Cheers!

jess said...

I love your vintage letter posts. That yellow dress is wonderful.

WAT said...

You make a great model Molly! I love it! You really look great.

Crazy Eddie said...

Each and every one of your selections are sublime. I love your style Molly.

Again, I really enjoy how you put your posts together, keeping the reader amused with peppered humor and sarcasm.

Besitos Molly love