he's a god, he's a man, he's a ghost, he's a guru

God, it's good to be back. I almost stumbled into an ill-timed bought of writer's block but luckily Lexie was to the resue, demanding "a list of your ten fave albums/singles/artists/however you want to post this from 2009".
Do-able!

I'm not sure if she means my favourite albums/singles/artists prominent in 2009, or just the songs I was most into in 2009. The is latter is way too hard so behold, in no particular order:

My Top 10 Favourite Albums/Singles/Artists of 2009


"Paparazzi" by Lady Gaga (video)
My ''relationship'', if you will, with Lady Gaga seems to be repetitive. I hear her new single and think "Eh, not quite on par with the last one". Then I see the video and enjoy it so ferociously that my obsessive YouTube viewings of it cause me to fall in love with the song. The best of her videos? "Paparazzi". It reminds me of a Jacqueline Susann novel (specifically Once Is Not Enough). Glamour on an extreme, histrionic level. The wheelchair and neckbrace were truly the icing on the cake.


"LoveSexMagic" by Ciara (song & video)
I don't know what it is, but I've always had a strong love for Ciara. Perhaps it's that her song "Promise" is one of the most beautiful Prince rip-offs I've ever heard, but I'm always interested in her new single. This one did not disappoint (as so, so many have). And, as much as I can't stand Justin Timberlake's cocky attitude, the video is killer too. I'm a sucker for a good afro.


"For Your Sorrow" by Big Boi feat. George Clinton and Too Short (song)
When I hear there's an OutKast song featuring George Clinton, you'd practically need industrial strength bungee cords and about three ounces of strategically placed SuperGlue (use your imagination) to hold me back. This one did not disappoint (besides its lack of Andre). From George's opening wheeze of "This is the dope on dope, smoke but don't choke on, its the shit. Plenty bloody junkies have been known to croak, but let's still toke up, it's the bomb" (I'm just guessing here...it is George, afterall) to Big Boi's "Stank you very much", this song is the sleazy Parliakastament Thang we've all come to know and love....from their one other collaboration.


This Is It by Michael Jackson (movie)
I'll say it flat-out ("with love", as MJ would say): the song blew. It is truly tragic that Michael Jackson's final single would be so mediocre. And that's the last I'm going to say of it, because out of extreme respect for Michael, I'm going to pretend it doesn't exist. The film, however, was fantastic. Tasteful, loving and revealing, it shows Michael how we should remember him: as a musician through and through. It is astounding and fascinating to watch him direct the musicians. He just knows music so well. For me, its still a toss-up between Michael and Prince as to the greatest performer of all time, but to anybody who enjoys pop music, this documentry will not disappoint.


"D.O.A." by Jay-Z (song)
2009 was also the year that I fell in love with Jay-Z and, despite my preference for his first album Reasonable Doubt, this cut proved he still got it.
"This ain't a number one record...this is practically assault with a deadly weapon"


"Red Right Hand" by the Arctic Monkeys (song)
I still haven't copped Humbug (though Christmas is tomorrow...) but I've been quite impressed with the Arctic Monkeys' new-ish sound. "Crying Lightning" was awesome too, but I think I slightly preferred this one.


"Honey" by Erykah Badu (song & video)
I know I've raved about this gorgeous soul song before, but you really must see the insidious and oh-so-clever video. You know 00:51 is my favourite moment. (If you didn't catch the reference, check it)

"3" by Britney Spears (song)
Ever since I got into Britney Spears a couple years ago (and that was a weird enough adjustment in itself), I've felt like the holiday season was truly her time. The past two Christmases my sister's present to me was her new album. Unfortunately, her "new" album this year is a greatest hits compilation, so I just went straight for the filthy single.
It's about threesomes, nuff said.


"Rockin' That Shit" by The-Dream (song)
I flat-out love this Prince rip-off. The explicit version is necessary, even though I adore the word "thang", because the clean version cuts out "bra". What fresh hell...?


"Drink in My Cup" by Electrik Red (video)
Electrik Red is to The-Dream what Vanity 6 were to Prince (on a much, much smaller scale of course), so you know I was intrigued. Most of their shit didn't blow me away, but I cannot get enough of the divine trashiness of this video. Why am I not getting into barfights and stealing chicken drumsticks from the kitchen? Oh yeah, cuz I'm not old enough to get into bars yet.
Still, that is no excuse. Bathroom stall dance sesh in T-minus, 5, 4, 3...

oh, i says the damndest things last night when i was running game...

Wow....Jesus....there are no words, really.

I haven't posted in 2 and a half months, and part of the reason I've been putting it off so much is because I feel like my return must be EPIC, a post that will be linked and gossiped about, a post that, perhaps, might even warrant a Youtube tribute video to the tune of "Walkin' On Sunshine". Unfortunately, said post never quite popped into my head fully formed so please bear with me while I try to get back into the schwang of thangs.

Excuses for my behaviour? (Or lack thereof, really) Well, I can dish em all out - new job, new boyfriend, new Betty Davis album - but it all comes down to who cares? I still mourn the devastating abandonment by Emma of her brilliant blog (2 years and counting, R.I.P. bbgurl), but all I can do is throw on the explicit version of "Sexy Can I" and wait for slow, gentle death.

Where to even begin?? I almost just threw myself off on a For the Love of Ray J tangent (glorious! Flavour of Love with an actually-attractive host!), but I have resisted.

I guess I should come bearing apology gifts. Aaaaaaand, those come in the form of amusing YouTube videos! (What else?)

George Clinton - "Do Fries Go With That Shake?!"
Leave it to George Clinton. This sleazy track (featuring Vanessa Williams) and its dynamite video will sho nuff put a smile on your face. Judging by George's face at 00:52, ladies in mismatched layers make his brain cease activity, and, judging by his pick-up lines, particularly in the linguistic department.
But does it make me question using him as my "historical figure who inspires you the most" during job interviews? Not for a second.
Oh, Georgie, one day we will frolic in a giant chocolate milkshake together, our souls funking as One.

And, for a cheap laugh, the Bill Cosby Pokemon Rap. How can you do anything but chuckle?

I'm still pimping out my online vintage store Safe as Milk Vintage, so...

...if those miniscule little pictures of items I have in store now whetted your appetite, I will provide the link once again (SAFE AS MILK VINTAGE) for those of you too lazy to scroll up to find it (and don't think I'm judging - I know your pain!)

Also, if you dig my store, or just feel like giving me a little support, join my Facebook fan page. And add me up! I go by Molly Jagger (not only a reference to the divine Mick, but also the wicked Jimi song "Dolly Dagger"). Just let me know you know me through blogging!

Well, let me get this posted before something drastic happens to delay my return further!

I am home, home to you.

Love me.

and the devil said, would you like to dance with me? we're doing the cosmic slop

I know it's been awhile and the simple reason for that is because I've had nothing to say. The long reason for that is that the sun has emerged and everyday I spend all my time lying out on the grass, biking through the forest and also doing not-spring-related things.
I have no big post theme, but have collected some miscellaneous thoughts and opinions for your enjoyment.

• You know what scenario I am fully sick and tired of seeing in YA novels? When the narrator has no idea that her close male friend is into her. Prime example: When Georgia Nicholson can't realize that Dave the Laugh (only one of the greatest fictional human beings to ever exist) is madly in love with her.
  What it usually looks like:
  I asked Tom for his advice on my situation with Blake. A funny look crossed his face and he told me he had heard some rather convincing rumours that Blake is extravagantly homosexual, not to mention he's really bad at lacrosse. I don't know what's gotten into Tom lately - he's been so moody. I bet it has something to do with him suddenly and unexpectedly dumping his girlfriend right around the time we started hanging out. I should try to get them back together.
  Yes, teen authors, I understand that there is such a thing as foreshadowing, and that you need to prepare us readers mentally or we will FALL APART with shock when the protagonist's closest male friend reveals himself to be into her. But come on! How often does this scenario happen in real life? We ladies have something called "women's intuition" - no matter how much false modesty we pile on a situation, we tend to suspect it deep down when a guy is into us. In fact, more realistic would be when we oversuspect and get the idea a guy friend is into us when he's not.
  Basically, it's played-out, unrealistic and boring. Enough!
  
  
• Lately I've been having a number non-sexual 30 Rock-themed fantasies. They range from getting a piggyback from Grizz to hiring the entire cast to be locked in a castle with me while I trip on mushrooms so hopefully when I transcend consciousness enough I'll start actually feeling like I'm on the show because judging from DVD extras, a lot of them seem a lot like their characters. Other fantasies include Jenna trying to teach me hip-hop dancing, making Tracy Jordan re-enact my favourite Busta Rhymes video and Jack Donaghy stroking my hair and telling me stories while I'm falling asleep.
  
  


• Flight of the Conchords...where have you been all my life?
  
• I'm going to Mission this weekend and I shall photograph over a dozen new items for my online store. So best be ready!
  
  
• Happy Birthday, Eddie Hazel! In the mood for a good old fashioned mindblowing sesh? Dig!
  
  
  
• In other Funkadelic-related news, I just found this video of them crazying (theres no verb for it really) around a park to the tune of "Cosmic Slop". It was the most joyous sight I'd ever seen. Ever. My spirits were instantly lifted. I couldn't decide which man I was in love with most. Seriously, in the first few seconds when they come bursting out of the darkness, energy on 100....I dare you not to get a little bit excited.

"i look like i eat tuna casserole all day" lookin' boy

Stylish Vancouverite Eyeliah has tagged me for the 7 Random Things tag. I do so love this tag, it's my third time doing it. I don't find it hard at all, because I'm pretty self-involved, and I love thinking about myself (sounds cold but true).

1. The celebrities I get told I resemble are Gail Zappa, Cory Kennedy, Miss Sparky (from the GTO's), Katie Holmes and Irina Lazareanu.

2. The South Park moment that amuses me most consistantly is in the episode "Tonsil Trouble" where Cartman gets accidentally gets infected with HIV, and responds to every "Are you sure?" with "I'm HIV-positive". It just never gets less funny.

3. Even though my friends rule and I enjoy being with them so much, I love being by myself and doing things by myself. I know lots of people prefer to do everything with friends (shopping, eating out, etc.), but I think it's important to feel comfortable doing all these activities on your own. It might sound sad to say that I'm my own best friend, but it feels great!

Exit Music (for a Film) - Brad Mehldau
4. I play piano and I'm learning Brad Mehldau's cover of Radiohead's "Exit Music". I'm not a big Radiohead fan, but I love this version, it's gorgeous and so much fun to play.

5. I know I'm behind on the trends, but I recently discovered both 30 Rock and Chuck Klosterman, and I can't get enough of either of them.

6. A website I've found fascinating as of late is stopsylvia.com , an anti-psychic Sylvia Browne page devoted to exposing the fraud she so clearly is. As someone with an interest in the afterlife, I'd read a couple of her books casually without forming a strong opinion on her. This website changed all that. It's absolutely infuriating what this woman does. She actually will give people medical diagnoses based on her "psychic" powers (which can discourage them from seeking proper medical advice if she says they're fine), but perhaps most appalling is the "work" she does regarding missing children. Two of her more well-known cases are regarding Shawn Hornbeck (she told his parents that he was dead, when he in fact was alive - you can only begin to imagine the traumatic effect this would have on them) and Opal Jennings (she told her parents that she was alive and being sold into sexual slavery in Japan, when in fact she'd been murdered in Texas - also devastating in a different manner). It's absolutely shocking that this woman is not only generally accepted as psychic, but that she's hugely popular and disgustingly wealthy. I urge you to check out StopSylvia.com, especially if you're a fan of hers.
(Another great article that sums up Sylvia Browne's fraudulence in a more condensed manner can be found here)


7. On a lighter note, I got into "Lookin Boy" while I was in vacation in the South and was distraught to return home to find that it was virtually unknown in Canada.
Y'all ready for another round of 'lookin boy'? Good, you are now. It's allll in the delivery.
(0:027...the guy on the left...Jazzy Jeff or what?)

throw your hands up now, let the music take control, this is how we roll

If you were born around the same time I was (late 80's, early 90's), you'll probably remember that glorious period of such musical richness known as the turn of the millenium.
Just to hit you in your nostalgia bone, here's some of the classics that exemplified the greatness of the times. We were truly blessed to be able to experience such classics in their prime.


Aaron Carter - "Not Too Young, Not Too Old" (2001)
You'd totally forgotten that at one point Aaron Carter was actually a pop star, didn't you? (Actually, more like you'd probably forgotten that at one point, people knew who Aaron Carter was) With his "fresh" beats and "def" rhymes, the original Mr. Carter was a rare musical progeny. Not afraid to get sassy ("Don't even playa-hate and try'n'say I look ten" - I wouldn't dream of playa-hatin' on you like that, Aaron - you look at least twelve) and not too proud to take advantage of his BSB connection by getting his older brother to sing the hook, Aaron was a brilliant meteor of star power and excellent rhymes - he could even awkwardly bust of some extremely white-boy breakdance moves. T-Pain, take note: Aaron busts out the AutoTune, robo-hook at 1:45 a good five years before you make your bread and butter on it. Aaron Carter: 2 - rap community at large: 0.
And the video ho's? You know the ones he's thrown his arms around and are rocking back and forth with him in a manner that looks extremely uncomfortable. They're definitely setting the standard for today's women of musical film. The way they lean out through giant R's and wave excitedly at Aaron? It oozes the sort of innocent sexuality that ends up with Aaron getting lipstick kiss marks everywhere on his face but the lips. Ouch.


Dream - "He Loves U Not" (2000)
You know these chicks mean business from the beginning: a little bit of piano paired with the girls posing in front of a neon sign of the band's name. And then...what's this? AutoTune again?? And to think all this time, I've been hailing T-Pain as a creative genius, and it's been the pop artists of the early oo's who innovated this trend. They just never stop influencin', do they?
Let's take a moment to appreciate their all-pink...what is that, suede? little dance suits. To anyone who thinks life has gotten continually worse since that 60's, look at how far we've come in the last decade, thank you. Also don't forget to appreciate the special effects at 2:49; I know my mind was blown.
It's nice that they add "And that's me" to the end of "He's into what he's got"...just in case we hadn't figured it out. Really, what this song makes me think is "They're going to be incredibly humiliated when their guy leaves them for this girl." Cuz it's inevitable! To paraphrase the Bard, "Methinks the lady doth protest too much" - if you're going to go on and on and on about how some common girl has no chance with your man, I think you're running scared a bit, dontcha think? However, the girl with the short blond hair just doesn't give a fuck. Look into her eyes - she's fantasizing about riding tractors with her girlfriend.
Still, pop genius courtesy of...Diddy? Mmkay, then.


O-Town - "Liquid Dreams" (2001)
You can't let the boy bands get off scot-free because, if anything, they were much worse. I mean, really, can you even believe now that millions of girls (and probably you - yes, you....J'accuse) wanted a man with frosted tips, sleeveless muscle shirts, suspicious facial hair, vinyl pants and an earring?
Even if you're too embarassed to watch the whole video, please, for your own sake, check out the overly enthusiastic "Damn!" at 0:37. It's also a little disconcerting that a thinly veiled ode to nocturnal emissions was such a splash (no pun intended...okay, intended a little bit now that I notice) among preteens. This thing really shows its age when you hear who exactly they combine to make their perfect girl.

Truly a flawless woman.


Crazytown - "Butterfly" (2001)
It's hard to sort this one into a genre...my instincts would call it shit-pop, but the band has lots of tattoos so it must be punk. It's sad but I've always found it amusing (on a most pedestrian level) when guys who obviously do lots of drugs wear the anti-drug D.A.R.E. shirts. But anyway, the dope rhymes keep this songs real - for example, "My lifestyle wild/I was livin' like a wild child". That one almost tricks you into thinking it's clever: "Whoa...quadruple rhyme." Don't be fooled.
Another fun, uh, feature is how they go from claiming that they don't deserve a woman to telling her that the smartest thing she ever did was take a chance with him. Textbook playa material - run, lady!
Anybody else get hardcore Zoolander flashbacks at 2:25?
The most notable thing about this song, for me, is that it contains one of my (many) pet peeves: when guys (usually in songs) think it's romantic to compare their own relationship to Sid and Nancy. That's almost...a murder threat. Yikes. Keep him away from hunting knives.

listen carefully to the sound of your loneliness, like a heartbeat drives you mad

I think we all know that the one area of my life where I am most blessed is in the concert department (also, hair - I have great hair). My lucky streak continues - yesterday I acquired tickets to go see Fleetwood Mac in May!
Sadly, it isn't my preferred Fleetwood Mac (i.e. early Peter Green) but in any case it should be wicked. Stevie Nicks used to be my idol, and I still think she's ridiculously cool. Lindsey Buckingham is, of course, also rad. It will be a huge honour to see two members of the original Fleetwood Mac (Mick Fleetwood and John McVie). True, Christine McVie won't be there, but I'm not gonna let that bring me down!
Here's a great video of Stevie Nicks-era Fleetwood Mac covering Peter Green-era Fleetwood Mac's "Oh Well".

Anybody else score Fleetwood Mac Unleashed tickets? Get on that shit, it'll be the bee's knees!

she did the freak, never missing a beat

"They still call it the White House
But that's a temporary condition, too."
-"Chocolate City" by Parliament

Tomorrow is a beautiful day.

Last week, I did a post about 20 men I admire. It was a really fun post and there's tons of men I admire, but I would now love to invent a similar meme about 20 women I admire. Most of these women, I have already done a post or two dedicated to them, so I'll link to that if there is one. I will tag 9 people (Keith [the originator of the 20 men meme], Libby, Maya, Mimi, Miss Karen, Jill, copperoranges, twenty.seven.cents and this wheel's on fire) to get it going, but I'm not going to say you have to tag people because, let's face it, that kind of pressure is annoying.

20 Women I Admire:

1. Grace Slick

2. Catherine James

3. Pattie Boyd

4. Anita Pallenberg

5. Eloise

6. Chan Marshall

7. Betty Davis

8. Elaine Benes

9. Erykah Badu

10. Sharon Tate

11. Courtney Brooke

12. Marianne Faithfull

13. Stevie Nicks

14. Pink

15. Fiona Apple

16. Pamela Des Barres

17. Gail Zappa

18. Zooey Deschanel

19. Kathy Griffin

20. Kate Hudson

in a notion ocean, daddy tropical storm, little piece of bargain home, please don't get caught, alright!

I know you, O dedicated Ashcan Rantings readers.
Your first stop on the Internet? Right here. A new post? You're all over it: you peruse (by the original definition) it three times, check out all the links, save the pictures, look up the title on Google (which you noticed for about a year now is always song lyrics), leave what you hope is a really witty comment (it isn't) and then continually check up to make sure no one comments anything wittier than you afterwards.
Yeah, I can read you like a book. I'm not saying I'm not flattered. It warms my heart (but only figuratively) to see your kind words. And at the same time, I'm not saying you're the reason I get up in the morning (the reason I get up in the morning is to caress my Eddie Hazel album and remind it that it too is loved), but my life would be a fraction less really-fuckin-rad without you.

That being said, I feel it is my duty as your guru to hip you to another amazing website.

Sup, cracked.com.
Cracked is a comedy website and....well, I won't beat around the proverbial bush...it's genius. There are many aspects to its brilliance:

There's the fantastic videos by the incomparable Michael Swaim.

6 Viral Videos that Qualify as Child Abuse

There are the interactive Craptions: "Timmy failed the 'Pick Which Tank The Fish Is In' test, confirming his parents worst fears that he was, in fact, a fucking idiot."

But, best of all, there are the lists. If you've been faithfully reading my blog (and I know you have), you'll know that I'm something of a fan of lists. From the 5 Celebrity Wikipedia Entries They Clearly Wrote Themselves to the 10 Most Sexually Unappealing Craigslist Postings, I think I've learned more from cracked.com than I have from 12 or so years of schooling, and been more entertained than I have from eighteen billions episodes of Simpsons (and that's not to say I don't find the Simpsons amusing, because I do, it's more of a testament to the importance of cracked.com in my life)

Let's please take a moment to appreciate the epic-ness of how run-on that sentence really was.

Perhaps my favourite of all of cracked.com's articles is the 11 Most Unintentionally Gay Rap Lyrics Ever. A petit sample to whet your appetite:

The Lyric:
"I get paid to rip, step aside, Im'ma blow you." ("Act Like You Want It" by Black Moon)
What He's Probably Saying:
"I get paid to be awesome, now get out of my way before I shoot you."
What We Like To Think He's Saying:
"Relax, I do this for a living, move a little to the left so I can give you oral sex."

The Lyric:
"Now, I never had my dick sucked by a man befo', but you gone be the first, you little trick-ass ho." ("Dollaz + Sense" by DJ Quik)
What He's Probably Saying:
"I'm so much of a badass, you're basically a woman in my presence, so I'm gonna make you blow me."
What We Like To Think He's Saying:
"I've never done this before, you know, let a guy put my junk in his mouth. This is my first time. You little trick-ass ho."

Yeah, there's more where that came from. And you know what? It's updated daily so there's pretty much humour coming atcha faster than you can giggle at it. I know you like that.
So what are you wating for?? In case you couldn't figure out the many links above, I'll make it extra big and simple for ya.

http://www.cracked.com/

For those rare moments when Ashcan Rantings alone can't do it for you...

it ain't beethoven, but it sure bounces

Despite foistering upon us the agony that is High School Musical, among many other infractions, I still feel that Disney has given us so much, not only in terms of freaking awesome movies, but musical gifts as well (and I'm not counting the Jonas Brothers here).

My Top 5 Favourite Disney Songs

5. "Everybody Wants to Be a Cat" (The Aristocats)
Ever wondered what would happen if cats got their hands on some chronic (and, uh, could talk and play instruments and dance)? They'd be beatniks, of course!
Racism scoring: 3/10
2:53-3:00 is pretty bad, but other than that, they're only dissing the entire human race - and any being that isn't a cat.
Highlight: 4:34, when they shake off the Duchess' mellow little number, and come back full schwang, gospel chorus-style ("Hallelujah"'s and all)


4. "Love" (Robin Hood)
I know I just posted about this one recently, but the song is so pretty, whimsical and a perfect summary of Robin and Maid Marian's laidback romance. I also adore her voice.
Racism scoring: 0/10
Miracle of miracles! I couldn't detect any racism at all on that one, just true love. Sigh, how beautiful.
Highlight: Not to be, like, super-cheesy, but the way they put their arms around each other in the very last second melted my heart. As for the song, 0:53-1:16 has Maid Marian's humming/half-singing making her sound very content. You know Robin Hood could satisfy any woman...er, fox, I mean.


3. "I Wanna Be Like You" (The Jungle Book)
Okay, this song just rules. No joke, I've got this on my iPod and I dance to it every day. It's way too much fun. I haven't seen the movie in about 10 years or so, but this song is genius.
Racism scoring: 7.5/10
It's not something a child would pick up on, but looking back, it's very clearly a statement reflecting how, in that day and age, many white people thought black people wanted to be white, civilized and "human" like them. I don't want to elaborate more, as once it was pointed out to me, it did detract from my enjoyment of the song, but I think if you watch it from that angle, it's pretty obvious.
Highlight: No doubt in my mind: "Rr-rrrr, getting mad, baby" (3:06)


2. "What Made the Red Man Red?" (Peter Pan)
I know, I know...growing up in an area very well-populated by First Nations people, I've always had a deep affinity for their culture. However, I'd be lying if I said Peter Pan didn't have something to do with that. I just flat-out adore this song.
Racism scoring: 11/10
It doesn't get any worse than this:
Insinuating that Aboriginal language is made up mumbo-jumbo ("Hana means what mana means and ganda means that too"), explaining why their skin in darker ("Let's go back a million years to the very first Injun prince/He kissed a maid and started to blush/and we've all been blushing since") and finally, discrediting any other sources ("You've got it right from the headman/the real true story of the red man/no matter what's been written or said")...have the First Nations people not suffered enough??
Highlight: Well, I've gotta say that Tiger Lily is one of the best dancers I've ever seen (1:25-1:33) and it has long been my goal to dance like her. And also, all political correctness aside about a minute (this is between us, okay, stranger?), I find the stories they set up hilarious.


1. "Poor Unfortunate Souls" (The Little Mermaid)
I have way too much fun with this song. When I listen to it (and I do that fairly often), I have to dance around and sing along and generally impersonate Ursula.
Racism scoring: 1/10
It's not doing purple-skinned people any favours, that's for sure.
Highlight: "You'll have your looks! Your pretty face! And don't underestimate the importance of....body language, ha!" (3:12-3:22) And then, further advice from Ursula, feminist extraordinaire: "The men up there don't like a lot of blabber/They think a girl who gossips is a bore/Yes, on land it's much preferred for ladies not to say a word/And, after all, dear, what is idle prattle for? Come on, they're not all that impressed with conversation/True gentlemen avoid it when they can/But they dote and swoon and fawn on a lady who's withdrawn/It's she who holds her tongue who gets her man"

Do you agree with my choices? What's your favourite Disney song?

shall i tell you about my life, they say im a man of the world...

Everyone knows Fleetwood Mac.

The name probably immediately gave you the image of gorgeous Stevie Nicks in her gypsy garb, possibly with a tambourine in hand, maybe even some white doves flitting about in the background. The music? It's good! Some beautiful songs, like "Tusk", "Gold Dust Woman", "The Chain", have emerged from this band and as far as nice voices go, well, they've got three.
However, before there was Stevie and Lindsay and Christine, Fleetwood Mac was a drastically different band. Gone were the California-kissed, easy-listenin' harmonies - Fleetwood Mac, led by Peter Green, was an amazing British blues band.

And I sadly neglected to include Peter Green in my best vocalists post, which is a terrible mistake. His voice is absolutely breathtaking. He's perhaps best known for taking one tab of acid too many and almost pulling a Syd Barrett, but the fact remains that he is an incredible guitar player, a fantastic vocalist and possesses my favourite non-black voice.

Unfortunately, Peter Green was someone whose talents far outweighed his mental ability to handle "the lifestyle" and his demons got the best of him. Today, he tours with his band, the Splinter Group, and though he never achieved the same level of fame that someone like, say, Stevie Nicks has, clearly there are some people who belong in the spotlight. Though Peter Green was not one of those people, he had so much to offer the music world. Please listen to and enjoy the following performances.

"The Green Manalishi" -
One of my favourites - you might've heard Judas Priests' cover.


"Need Your Love So Bad" -
Ignore the fact that this video is mimed. The vocals and guitar are heartwrenchingly beautiful.


"Oh Well (Pt. 1)" -
Badass, raucous guitar, sometimes giving way to Peter Green's amazing voice (and beautiful smile).


"Rattlesnake Shake" -
On Playboy TV in 1969 - there's an "amusing" little intro with Hugh Hefner, who calls them "The" Fleetwood Mac.

shawty, let me holla at you, you so hot, hot, hot, hot, you think i'd be hollerin, if you not, not, not, not?

This is an important and festive season - it's also the time of year where I single out my favourite and most despised singles from Top 40 radio. Past losers have been Rihanna's "Unfaithful" and Avril Lavigne's "Girlfriend". Past winners have been Ciara's "Promise" and Kanye's "Can't Tell Me Nothing"
Despite stiff competition from Lil Wayne and Britney Spears (If "If U Seek Amy" had been a single, it definitely would've taken this), I've gotta give it to Chris Brown and T-Pain's "Kiss Kiss". Though technically, I think I might be squeezing them in, as I'm pretty sure this was released in 2007. Still, since I don't really listen to Top 40 radio, this song only caught my attention this year, and I love it. Sure, some of the lyrics are weak ("Why is you hatin' at my anatomy?"???), but overall this song (and video) are insanely fun.


And the song that came closest to convincing me to never ever put faith in top 40 radio again was Rihanna's absolutely horrendous, not-even-fun-in-a-guilty-pleasure-way "Take a Bow". I've always had a problem with Rihanna, and this is it: she's boring. I can forgive that she can't sing (though I loathe her whiny attempts), and I can forgive that she doesn't write her own music, but I cannot forgive that she has no stage presence at all and no reason (beyond bland good looks) for a career in entertainment. Say what you want about an artist like Britney Spears, but at her peak, she could march onstage and everyone would look at her, watch her and be entertained and, oh yeah, she can dance like a motherfucker. While I've never liked Rihanna, I saw her as inoffensive, another pop-tart being marched out to warble songs crafted by other people. However, when she duetted with the legendary band the Time at the Grammy's a year or so back, my mild annoyance went to knee-jerk dislike. And I'm not a fan of how she's now being recognized as an "innovator" - oooh, she cut her hair, she's soo edgy...what's this? Leather?? YIKES! Rihanna is a good girl gone bad! And now she's a fashion icon? Please, I bet that girl doesn't even remember what it's like to choose her own outfit.
Okay, breathe in through the nose, out through the mouth....(you should've expected this, it's Ashcan Rantings after all).
I'll focus on the song. Generic balladry at its dithering worst, with non-rhyming lyrics (a pet peeve of mine) that just ooze bitterness. Lazy similes and a weak voice make this the most frustrating combination for a pop song: boring and bad. I don't even understand how this got radio play. And, God, did it ever get radio play! I'm just glad that I haven't had to hear it for a couple months now...though we as a society haven't fully extracted ourselves from Rihanna's devilishly dull clutches - one day, I pray.
I don't want this godawful song being heard on my blog, if you feel the need to subject yourself to that pain, you may do so here

How do you feel? Agree? Disagree? Rihanna fan in a defensive mood? Bring it.

don't bring me no bad news, don't tell me the concert's been called off

The Top 5 Concerts I've Been To:

1. George Clinton & Parliament-Funkadelic
Date: July 20th, 2008
Location: Winston-Salem, North Carolina
Proximity to stage: About 20 feet
Highlight: "Cosmic Slop" featuring Michael "Kidd Funkadelic" Hampton
Youtube clip for your enjoyment: A heavy badass version of "You and Your Folks, Me and My Folks" , an awesome version of "Bounce 2 This" featuring the ridiculously cool Kendra Foster
2. Prince
Date: August 17th, 2007
Location: London, England
Proximity to the stage: About 1.4 miles
Highlight: Hearing a brief excerpt of one of my favourite Prince songs, "If I Was Ur Girlfriend", and a gorgeous version of "Shhh"
Youtube clip for your enjoyment: Ha, yeah, right!

3. Arlo Guthrie
Date: April 6th, 2007
Location: Vancouver, BC
Proximity to stage: About 15 rows back
Highlight: All his fantastic stories, and hearing one of my favourite songs of all time "Coming into Los Angeles" done live...oh, yeah, and meeting the guy!
Youtube clip for your enjoyment: Unfortunately, none from the concert. However, anyone can get a kick out of Arlo Guthrie's legendary Woodstock performance of "Coming into Los Angeles", which (fun fact) is my favourite part of the Woodstock movie
4. the Arctic Monkeys

Date: September 30th, 2007
Location: Vancouver, BC
Proximity to the stage: About 5 feet
Highlight: "From the Ritz to the Rubble"
Youtube clip for your enjoyment: "Nettles/The View from the Afternoon", featuring Alex going "Someone's got a laser pen...didn't know you could still get those" around 1:27...another special bonus is that the person who filmed this was standing right behind me so you can see the exact view I had, and as well, at about 3:27 you see my turn my head to say something to my friend

5. Black Mountain
Date: August 29th, 2008
Location: Victoria, BC
Proximity to the stage: Front row...I was sitting on the stage during some points
Highlight: When they played one of my favourite songs of all time, "Wucan"...and when I met the keyboard player, who told me the secret of "Wucan"
Youtube clip for your enjoyment: Unfortunately there's none available from the show I was at, but here's "Wucan" live at a different show

[all pictures from the original concerts I was at; none taken by me - I don't want to waste my time at a concert I really enjoy trying to get a picture!]

Of course, I've seen more than 5 concerts, and my apologies to Talib Kweli, Bob Dylan, Neil Young, REM, Crosby Stills & Nash, k-os, Marianne Faithfull and others...all of whom put on excellent shows. These are simply the best of the best, and if you happen to notice that any of them are in your town, I must insist that you go see them. You'll thank me for it later!